Courses of Jumble

'Just this' forever? I have a particular friend I think of often in that regard - he moved down to Austin after spending his first summer out of college home, and I am pretty sure he is doing in Austin precisely what he did here - barely worked and had a lot of amazing adventures. While amazing adventure is for sure a good reason and a good thing to do for awhile, I think it runs out for people who are purpose-driven. He is a really conscious, smart cookie, so I have a feeling that this kind of lifestyle will not last for him forever.

I have to admit that I am envious of that- ie getting out to unfamiliar places and experiencing - but I am coming to realize that I can do that without moving or having it work related. I think I have been hesitant to accept that, because I do not want to become the kind of person who works a grueling job she hates to get to vacation time so I can flee my real life. That has been a struggle. However, I am at the same time realize that a lot of people that I love are at home, and I do love the Twin Cities. So maybe for me, that just means taking part in fulfilling work here, a place I love, and then taking the opportunities it allows me, or social obligation allows me, to go on adventures as I can.

Beyond that; confusion. It feels like a matter of trying to decifer what things I want to move toward. I feel like last fall, I had strained the soup for the big objects. Now, I feel like a big pot of soup. Yes, soup.

In a more defined explanation, I have realized that I have a whole lot of interests that are not necessarily going to be catered to should I choose to go for a Dance MA. In the midst of thinking further about all this, I started thinking about and compiling information on other programs that might suit my specific interests, and have come to various different ideas; Public Health, Event Planning, Venue Ower, etc. I have realized that the one common thread holding all my interests together is my desire to connect people to one another physically and socially. It bothers me so much that more and more of our leisure is becoming remote and static, and I want to be a part of the movement that encourages people to enjoy being physically active and social. I have tried to boil this down into a statement of sorts;

To first understand and draw conclusions, and then make use of data and possible new research to encourage abstract movement (social dance) and somatic practices as leisure/ lifestyle options that provide mental and physical health benefits. Using these ideas as an alternative to current public health outreach, which is very exercise and diet focused, can engage new audiences in a time of crisis physical and mental health crisis, which has been encouraged by our work and even our play developing to require less physicality and social interaction.

In the midst of all this future change thought, which is both confusing of course but also exciting, one thing that has stayed consistent is my desire to perform and choreograph. I am seeing a day-time, money-making career shift as an opportunity to work less for more money so I can spend half the work week on whatever that is, and the other half on my work as an artist.

I am grateful that at least that desire has not changed.