An Open Christmas Letter to Friends

Oh boy.

It seems that I find myself typing a Christmas letter. I sit here, considering the amount of time I have spent making fun of such things in the past. Keyword – past. It is amazing how things shift as you increase in age, and how you find yourself identifying with things you formerly thought were strange, such as only seeing best friends once a month or every couple months, getting tired at 10pm, turning down another beer…..

I am realizing that, as we grow older and better define our lives, our schedules become radically more different. The light bulb – it is not a lack of desire that keeps us from seeing or speaking to our favorite people as much as we wish – it is a simple matter of your time being more full and more inconsistent. I like to jokingly refer to situations of mismatched schedules as a syndrome of becoming adult-like. While such a symptom can be frustrating, it can yield wonderful surprises, such as finding those with whom you can pick up with from where you left without a hitch in the conversation. Moments such as these make all the in-between time worth the wait. Additionally, you find the people that you maybe never exchange communication with, yet still find yourself thinking about here and there. I like to think of these people in our lives bearing in mind this phrase; friendships do not have to be life-long to be life-changing.

What I am getting at, after quite the run-around (shocking, I know. I have always been someone of so few words J ), is that I can see the purpose of the Christmas letter more and more clearly each year. As someone who, regardless the amount I see you or speak to you, is a life-changing friend, this Christmas letter, I see, is just another way to create connection! So follow my yellow-brick road…….. If I begin in January of 2009, I was living in Calgary, Canada, training with a wonderful company called Decidedly Jazz Danceworks, and living in a house with three lovely gals who turned out to be wonderful friends. With them and the many other friends I made there, I became a more huggy person, threw some great parties, helped through tough times and was helped through tough times. I saw some beautiful mountains in the Canadian Rockies in Banff National park, danced in a elementary school educational show on jazz dance and saw more gymnasiums than I expected to for the next several years, honed my ear and my eye to dance as music visualization, increased my already growing passion for musical, jazz and vernacular-related dance forms, had my choreography selected for a professional festival, and learned how to inject some balance into a usually too-busy lifestyle. Now that I am home, I have yet to emulate those qualities here that I gained while in Calgary. I have realized that I will always err on the side of crazy when it comes to the amount of things on my plate on any given time, but at least now I see that and know I must inject some down time into that schedule.

Landing back home in Minneapolis in May after realizing that, sometimes no amount of work you do will change government regulations, I decided to shift my desires toward other goals, and made plans to move to Chicago in September to train with another jazz-based company. I lived at home in Prior Lake with my family for the summer (which was great after being gone for so long), and worked as Summer Education Assistant at Youth Performance Company, a youth theatre education organization, where I met some great people and had a wonderful time. In addition, I danced in the summer show with the Eclectic Edge Ensemble, a local jazz company that I have been with now for four seasons, and co-produced, choreographed for and danced in a local jazz dance choreographer’s collective showcase we titled Rhythmically Speaking. This show panned out to honestly be one of the highlights of my life to this point – we had nearly sold-out audiences every night, wonderful fun dancing together, got reviewed in the Star Tribune newspaper, and felt at the end that we had really created another spark for the Twin Cities jazz dance scene. After seeing the crowds our show drew, there is absolutely no question that there is an eager, excited jazz dance audience in out cities. The show was at the Bedlam Theater August 20-22, and after completing that, I spent another state fair working for the 4H program, after which I moved to Chicago.

Chicago, though short-lived, was another learning experience for me – after getting there, only to realize quickly that it was not the place or time for me, I realized that sometimes no amount of planning can trump gut-feelings. After re-evaluating my personal and professional goals, I decided to move back to the Twin Cities, and it ended up being a wonderful choice. A choice not without trials, I have been impatient with working 30 hours a week working at a coffee shop, knowing that is just a place-holder and a creator of cash. However, when I hear employment rate statistics on the radio, I am reminded to be grateful just to be employed, and then I get over myself. The reasons I took the job (flexibility, leaving it there when I am done working) have been fulfilled up to this point, and I do enjoy the shop and my co-workrs, so I just have to keep reminding myself that it is just for now and I am taking many great steps toward other more important things.

During the other hours of my work week, which I have found to be at least equal to the 30 I spend on the day time cash job, I have been teaching dance all over the metro, working toward becoming a certified personal trainer (which is the idea for the next day job!), and rehearsing and performing with the Eclectic Edge Ensemble (jazz company) and the Wild Goose Chase Cloggers, an Appalachian clogging group that I just joined! Most importantly, I have been working on my own choreography and progress toward eventually having my own music, jazz and vernacular-based dance company in the Twin Cities. Among such progress is planning future jazz choreographer shows, launching a blog and newsletter on jazz dance in Minnesota (www.mnjazzdance.wordpress.com), showing my work in several local showcases, and doing a lot of research and thinking regarding the development of my own style. To get a better idea of what this means, see what shows are coming up for me, and to watch a work sample, visit my website (I am proud of it, and owe a lot of thanks to Kris, the center of a fantastic, supportive relationship and creator of the site); www.erinnliebhard.com.

Though there are difficulties here and there (and aren’t there always in this life), I have a lot to be grateful for, including wonderful people in all departments of my life – family, friends, relationship, mentors, co-workers, creative professionals. I am enjoying being back in the Twin Cities, but know two things about future locations; 1. I will definitely have some more adventures before I land, including graduate school in dance theory (I have been accepted to the University of Surrey in England but have chosen to defer until the time is right), and 2. when I DO land, it will be in the great state of Minnesota, home of my ever-expanding Midwestern pride. I know that I have a lot to figure out yet, but feel that I am on the right track, and I truly owe that to people like you, who have been their along the way for this life that has been a sequence of wonderful adventures, with more to come.

So cheers to adventure, and hopes that our paths will cross again so we can seek some more…………………

Sincerely,

Erinn Liebhard

What a Weekend....

I am getting to it a bit late, but that matters little, because my excess excitement from this weekend - Wild Goose Chase Cloggers 30th Anniversary Show weekend - is still as sharp as a tack.

Mixing wonderful, varied people, a kitschy space, a lot of food and a bit of liquor, and any kind of dancing creates an excellent cocktail. In the days to come, I was looking forward to the weekend while also feeling like it might get a bit long. It did not take long into Saturday's practice to realize that the second part of my assessment was incorrect - the time went by all together too quickly.

The people - these people, pulled together by a love for old time music or clogging or rhythm-making, come from all sorts of work backgrounds, many different places, are of many different ages, and their other talents and interests are amazing and varied. Among the stand-out people experiences was meeting and chatting with an ethnomusicologist, who happened to be one of the hosts of the party that was thrown Saturday night. Though I met him on my way out the door, he took the time to chat with me and answer some questions about grad school. He was, in fact, so invested in the conversation that he took me up to the library to grab me a couple of books, excitedly insisting that I must give them a read, and then drop him a call to chat about them! This is just one example of the kind of quick connections and support I felt throughout the weekend.

Of course I cannot overlook the space in which we operated. Moving our efforts from the Oddfellows hall on Saturday to the Bedlam on Sunday for rehearsal and the show, I keyed in to the fact that there is always something about getting into the actual place where you will be performing that lights your insides on fire. Bedlam especially - it is the kind of place you can come into and feel like you are at home - for the amount of time that you have it to present your show, it morphs to feel like you have lived there for years.

Over the course of the weekend, I also could not help but notice how much these people seemed to love food! The food at the party was immpecable, the food that WGCC founding member and now event-planner Greg brought to the Bedlam on Sunday was ridiculous, the amount of food and drink lavished across the crowd at the end of the show was far beyond what I imagined. This piece of the experience leads me to one thing - these people like to enjoy themselves, and the things that create enjoyment are simple things - good people, a good place to be, good food and drink, and most importantly - music and dancing.

Oh the music and dancing. Live cajun music and social dancing, Irish music, old time music, bluegrass music, bagpipes, clogging, waltzing, square-dancing.....yes, this all happened within the span of 36 hours. I have mentioned to a couple of people that the more time I spend studying and practicing dance, the less and less I am interested in perfecting and presenting things that 'normal' people could never do. This is not to say that I am completely un-interested in a wow-factor. The kind of wow-factor I enjoy is one that is, after development of a love and dedication, and some practice, accomlishable for anyone who chooses it. Dance should be about the practice as well, not just the presentation. When brought up in concert dance, one spends so much time preparing for and worrying about a one or two or three time shot at showing people. When involved in social dance, the experience of doing is just as important, if not more, as is the presentation of an end result to outsiders.

More eloquently, I am becoming more interested in dance that asks you to join in rather than to just watch. Breaking from the show into a square dance was absolutely inspirational - asking the audience to share the floor and come spend time dancing - to me, dance should make you want to hop out of your chair and join in!

To sum up this random jumble of thoughts, I took away so much from this weekend in regards to how I practice, think about, view and experience dance. This group as already inspired me so greatly, and I am looking forward to what I am guessing will be a lot more time dedicated than I had initially expected!

Cheers to the practice being just as important as the presentation.



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SHOW ROUND-UP: Shows seen 11/6 - 12/4

Wake The Dead
Rainy Day Cabaret at the Old Arizona Theater
November 5-7

Much Ado About Nothing
Prior Lake High School Theatre
November 5-13

Ruined
Mixed Blood Theatre
October 16 - November 22

27th Fall Concert
Zenon Dance Company
November 19-29

***The stand-out; 'Booba' by Andrea Miller, Artistic Director of Gallim Dance in New York City. This dance is an excerpt from the larger work 'I Can See Myself in Your Pupil,' of which excerpts can be seen on YouTube - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewKtJOMGqGg. I literally laughed my ass off the whole piece. Laugh out loud kind of laugh. The sheet randomness, oddity and ridiculousness of the movements, facial expressions and formations was enough for this dance to need to exist.

I was also extremely kinesthetically affected, as the more I explore my own movement tendencies, the more I find myself wanting to move in abnormal yet rhythmic ways. It is arguable that all dance is composed of abnormal movements - movements outside of what the body does to locomote itself through the tasks of daily life, such as walking, standing, eating. To a dancer, at a certain point, all widely accepted and taught dance vocabularly becomes normal movement, movement that is used to locomote the body through a regular day. Maybe my desire to move in splayed, gyrating ways to complicated rhythmic patterns it is due to a partnership beween my want to explore movement outside of regular, taught dance vocabulary and to listen to music with rhythms that make me want to dance. Whatever it is, this piece hit me hard in the heart and the funny bone, and injected me with inspiration.

Beaverdance
Bedlam Theatre
December 3-19

Sounds of the Season
Bloomington Medalist Band
December 7th

Can't Read It

I cannot read it anymore.

I have tried a couple times over the last couple of years, the lastest time the most successful, getting ALMOST half-way in (the book being a total of 185 pages). 185 pages is something I should rip through in no time. Especially when the book pertains to art. So I guess that just means it is bad....

Which book? ------ "The Romantic Manifesto" by Ayn Rand.

It was my intention to spend some time today thinking creatively by reading this book. When I picked it up to read it, I found myself dreading the time I would spend, taking it only to complete the task I had set forth some several weeks ago. I then decided that I am not a masochist and should not force myself to do things I do not enjoy doing. Wow, what a revelation.

I guess I thought if I continued reading that I would like it, considering that I really enjoyed "The Fountainhead" and "Atlas Shrugged," and consider the former to be one of my favorite books. The source of this favoritism has much to do with the detailed yet light and interesting way she writes, but also with her philosophy - in ways.

These 'ways' match how I am in 'ways' what one might consider conservative politically - I am to a certain extent for the idea of limited government, all about personal responsibility, and can often see the benefits of self-interest (insert Ayn Rand here). At the same time, I am a believer of some government sponsored social programs and in all aspects of human rights.

These ideas being at odds with one another 'in ways' exemplify how, as a 'liberal' artist with personal responsibility streak, my past enjoyment of Ayn Rand is at odds with my current feelings of deterence and desire to laugh at some of her musings. Examples;

"Art is not the means to any didactic end." - Pg. 22

Art is one of the best ways to share moral and ethical ideas, as well as a structure in which to teach such ideas. To suggest that art is merely in the moment and participatory (which are indeed some of its best situations, but not only) is to limit its capacities.

"The product of America's anti-rational, anti-cognitive, "Progressive" education, the hippies, are reverting to the music and drum-beat of the jungle." - Pg. 64

This is just plain hilarious. Back to the idea of participatory and sensory experiences, suggesting that hippies are anti-cognitive is hilarious! If someone is dancing to music or beats, in those moments, all they can think about is the sound and how their body is reacting - could anything be more cognative? Cognation does not need to be planned or forced in order to be experienced, reacted to, and gained from.

"Music is an independent, primary art. Dance is not. In view of their division of labor, the dance is entirely dependent upon music." - Pg. 69

Also just plain funny. I find it interesting that I am actually taking the time to refute this, as an intense purveyor of the idea that dance that is inspired from and exists due to music is not only valid but incredible. However, there certainly is a large piece of me that insists that dance is an act of art in itself that in no way REQUIRES music. In this same line of thought, I also prescribe to the idea that music requires artistic motion - in my mind, dance - to exist. Therefore - dance and music can certainly be lookd upon as free-standing art forms, but when examined deeply, lean on one another to exist. When this thought is broadened, I would go so far as to suggest that no art form can exist without the presence of others silently informing one another.

I did eventually get to Pg. 120, but the last quote from Pg. 69 was so hilarious to me that I did not get much out of the subsequent 50 pages.

So thanks, Ayn, for applying objectivism to art - in defending romanticism alone in creation, you have provided me with several wonderful fits of giggles.

An Act of Creation - "The House Can't Stand"

A simple one - meditating on and putting into words thoughts on the show I absorbed last night.

"The House Can't Stand," written and performed by Steve Epp and directed by Dominque Serrand, was both a romp through the mind of a wife left alone to her house by a deceased husband and relocated children as well as a stringing together of several politically-minded theatre happenings. Visually, each individual picture the show created (down to the sock on the legs of the table in the set) was brilliant. Yet, those pictures were created from and motivated by both intense characterization and the abandoning of such a labor.

The two artistic minds behind the show created an utterly fascinating character whose actions were equally as fitting later on in the show as they were unexpected at the beginning of the show, speaking to the cultivation of a personality intensely interesting enough on its own. I do not say 'enough' to suggest that such a thing should be left as is when it can be further developed by a fitting storyline or creation of a series of images, but rather to underscore the importance of letting a solid character hold it's weight. I felt that the weight the character created initially was made less so by the amount of randomization that came to pass within the second half of the 'storyline.'

I am also not trying to suggest that any 'good' show MUST have a solid, follow-able storyline; I am simply saying that a very clearly defined character, such as the aging housewife in this play, should be allowed to pull it's weight, and should not have to knock fists with numerous storylines for attention.

At the same time I pull down the value of having too many random things going on, I would like to boost it back up in the fact that the idea and execution of 'happenings,' can be very intriguing by themselves. Transitions from the side of a far-off road to a Hooverville-style tent encampment to the tent of Abraham Lincoln and back again to the suburban house where we started was interesting enough in itself, but my interest was hard to maintain as I tried to sort out the relevance of it all to the character that was earlier on in the play so strongly developed.

In a nutshell, I highly enjoyed the visual and movement aspects of the show - I'll get so specific as to say that I was pre-occupied in a good way by how the character's left leg stayed more straight than the right, even creating an interesting physical profile for how she approached the situations in which she was put. Additionally, I was quite taken by the character created, and the ridiculously witty and relevant one-liners tossed. I just wish the journey I followed her on had a bit more clarity.

A New Artists Statement

How is this for change?

Artist Statement, February 2008:

I began my involvement with dance as an energetic child who enjoyed being in motion and exploring life’s possibilities while playing dress-up. Noticing this, my parents enrolled me in dance class, and a pairing of innocent preferences developed into a passion for the art of dancing. My formal dance education at the U of M helped me identify the capability to focus on an objective, utilize determination, put to work my ability to be resourceful, and to correctly attend to my strengths and weaknesses regarding the pursuit of a multi-faceted career revolving around dance.

Though in hot pursuit of a professional life with variety, I have been surprised since graduation to note how important the production of my own creative work has become. I have seemed to lock into the medium of movement because it has constant shift – no two performances are ever the same. I have also begun to notice my increasing disillusionment with words. In a society that is increasingly injected with more digital images and sounds everyday, there is something refreshing about working with and viewing a physical, human body. Further, the rapidly-spreading societal plague of being ‘too busy’ and in need of constant convenience makes me feel as though people are frequently missing out on the small but poignant moments in life. If there is any a time to stop and notice, it is in witnessing the messages human bodies can transmit while moving with intention. I have often thought that my interest in this subject matter comes from my inherent need for organization and resulting tendencies to miss out on chance happenings. I yearn to break free from such habits, and look upon creation of performance art as a chance to communicate how I constantly see related predicaments in others. It is the central idea helping people identify and address their tendencies toward such complacency in life which pushes me forward.

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Artist Statement October 2009:

A Twin-Cities-based performer, choreographer, producer, administrator, teacher and writer/theorist, I seek to refine my creative interests in rhythmic and musical dance, specifically jazz and socially-related forms, through a series of many expected and unexpected experiences.

I began my involvement with dance as an energetic child who enjoyed being in motion and exploring life’s possibilities while playing dress-up. Noticing this, my parents enrolled me in dance class, and a pairing of innocent preferences developed into a passion for the art of dancing. My formal dance education at the University of Minnesota helped me identify the capability to focus on an objective, utilize determination, put to work my ability to be resourceful, and to correctly attend to my strengths and weaknesses. In the pursuit of a professional life with variety, I have enjoyed working in many capacities as a dance artist, yet the production of my own creative work has consistently come to the forefront of my efforts. In the search to define my creative impulses, I have been trying to break down why it is that I love to dance, and have come to find one constant; I love to create and match with my body the rhythms and musical qualities that I hear and sense.

I enjoy dancing socially just as much as I enjoy dancing in a concert setting, and the common thread between those two things is music. Musicians savor a close relationship between their ears and mind, and by throwing in the additional element of the eyes, musically-motivated dancers develop a keen relationship between the operation their body and the acting of listening to music; in short, they create a visceral absorbing of and response to music. Our bodies run on the rhythm of the heart, and this intense human experience alone is enough to create purposeful, satisfying, engaging and visceral dance, particularly when matched with just the right tune. The sheer variety of rhythmically connected music and dance creates seemingly endless possibilities for movement and idea explorations, as well as an electric environment fostering the constant wonder of could be done next. Truly understanding musicality, rhythm and honesty in emotion can provide a solid base for successfully and whole-heartedly catapulting into new musical and movement territory.

Within these explorations, I seek to define how dancers can embrace integrity and honesty to their personal experiences as a way to access a piece’s intention, providing them a way to truly connect to and therefore better understand and present the work. Intention within my work often relates to how embracing the need for constant convenience and the idea of being ‘too busy’ can cause people to miss out on the small but poignant moments in life.

My enjoyment of creating and matching with my body the rhythms and musical qualities that I hear and sense, connecting to the music, versatility, the creation and embracing of humanness and personal integrity through abstract movement, and the desire to assist people in opening up their eyes to the small, poignant moments are the things that move me forward (well, in many directions actually) as a choreographer and versatile dance artist.

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Reading one against the other really puts into perspective how much I have come into my own regarding my thoughts on dance in the last year and a half. I was about to type 'how my thoughts on dance have changed,' and realized that to be far from true; this new artist statement sums up the things that have always been operating in the back of my head, even through my time studying modern and post-modern dance in college. While delving deeply into that kind of thought around dance was something I value and would never take back, I am feeling relieved that I have found the right place for that information in my brain, and am beginning to learn how to let my heart lead instead.

And when my heart leads (and lets my head come with), I know now what is powering it and how to describe it.

The Passing Of Time

Seems to level things off a bit. Something that can seem frustrating and like the only thing that matters in the world can become extraineous when left to simmer for a length of time. Another way of saying this exists in the immortal words of my wise, world-observing grandmother;

"Things will always look better in the morning."

This advice was passed on to me via my mother, and I find it true time and time again. I tend to fixate on problems at hand so intensely that all other things are shut out of my mind, in turn eventually shutting down my ability to think like a rational person. When I am willing to sink in to this idea of letting go of the thing being fixated upon for now, only with the promise to return to it later, I am able to bypass that fixation due to the perspective gained in what is often just a half a day to a day or so.

Fixation (when it comes to problems) = Stagnation
Fixation (when it comes to creative thoughts) = Thick and exciting new ideas

That is all for formulaic advice today.

Big Thoughts

In writing this, I realize that I am not sure where my five-year plan is – the one that I created as a part of my Survival Skills class as a junior in college, over three years ago. This is not so much a problem, considering my ideas of what I would be doing within that time have proved to be drastically different from what I ended up doing – in a great way. I am definitely curious to create comparison, but I have a relatively good idea – perform. I am not sure what the mention of my location happened to be, but location and content definitely ended up different – I found my interest in choreography quite quickly, just a couple months out of school. As school was ending, I specifically remember thinking to myself ‘choreography was fun to do in school, but just not my thing.’ As it turns out, three years from when I wrote that plan, I have produced three shows and had work in three others. Though my stream of ideas is not yet always consistent, my feelings of inspiration definitely are – I have been feeling constantly stimulated by tons of things – people, music, rhythms, situations, landscapes – I feel like I am (almost) never switched off.

Even the breeze that just hit me, as I sit here on my recently-attained Chicago patio feels inspiring. I had a moment of ‘oh no, will I regret it if I leave,’ followed by the realization that the few feelings of inspiration that I have felt in the last few days have been generated by things I could notice and feel in many places – that they are not specific to Chicago. Feeling that breeze and looking around to realize that I am sitting on a high porch of an old, character-filled brick building that soaks in the sounds of salsa and the smells of many different kinds of cuisine – THESE surroundings should make me feel inspired, yet I sit here with the feeling that this just isn’t right traipsing around through my consciousness.

I have only within the last few hours started developing the feeling of wondering about what I may miss out on if I do not stay, though again the rewards reaped from heading to what my heart tells me will likely bypass opportunities I could receive here in the short amount of time I am now willing to stay. Let’s say it was still my plan to stay until I got into the company – I think I could accomplish such I thing. Committing to staying here, I could create an amazing toehold for myself, get connected with some great people, and really get some things going. However, I can feel quite strongly that Chicago is not where my heart is. Particularly with the kind of work I want, my heart cannot be anywhere but with me at all times.

I now find myself pondering the idea that I stay a couple of months to study with JRJP, as I already have an apartment. There is a flaw to this logic – I would still need to find a job – I cannot just spend what I have to be here for a couple of months. Getting a job for a couple months then quitting seems quite silly, unreasonable and hard to attain. Let’s say I stayed two months – with two classes a week from them, I would be getting sixteen classes – I got 15 classes during the week I took the intensive, which I plan to continue taking. I keep flashing back to the idea of wanting to really learn this – which I continue to realize just does not interface with where I want to be in the next even just five years.

My natural tendency is to want to do way more than my time and my brain can actually handle, due simply to the fact that I am a motivated person with many interests. In all this thinking, I realized that I have been maintaining way too many unarranged goals with way too little order and careful thought. “I want to get an MA,” “I want to get a PHD,’ “I want to write books,” “I want to own a dance company in the Twin Cities,” “I want to do research,” “I want to perform.” Throwing in “I want to further pursue this important relationship,” was what really put the breaks on my speeding train of ideas, and forced me to sit down and think about how these things all operate together. I truly did take love, realizing it, voicing it, and most importantly to this rant, moving again, to realize all this.