Continually seeking matter . . .
Presence
Listening
Trust
Gratitude . . .
There it is/ there they are. At the risk of sounding like a mass-manufactured coffee cup, the above words and their order feel very important to me. They were arrived to after several hours and many pages of of writing and reflection. I scaled resolutions that go all the way back to 2007 (though I started this elaborate New Years Resolution tradition in either late high school or early college), evaluated my success in these ideas, pondered a whole year's worth of journal entries through the lens of last years resolutions, considered my hopes for this next year and beyond, and used all of this information to formulate the above ideas.
Within my process, I wrote out and reasoned through why the above concepts feel so pertinent and important to me right now. For so many, the process of creating New Years Resolutions is about deciding to take action. I am very good at taking action. I jump in without hesitation, I am quite efficient, and rarely ever procrastinate or lack motivation. Rather, my reflections affirmed that I wish and need to focus my efforts upon how I take action.
When I chose to take action, I wish to first dedicate myself to being present as it unfolds and throughout the process. I am practiced in prematurely looking toward the next step, and I feel it would be greatly beneficial to focus on experiencing the present in conjunction with planning ahead. Next, I am asking myself to listen more carefully to myself and the other people, the environment and the energy along the way. I have a tendency to skip this step in favor of efficiency, which can be ill-perceived and derailed easily when time, space and energy to make apt adjustments is not prioritized.
As present and listening unfold, I wish to trust myself. I am a confident person with a track record of making excellent decisions, yet doubt, fear and guilt easily work their way into my thought processes. While questioning ones choices develops self-reflexivity and engagement, doing so constantly can erode the trust a well-adjusted person should encourage within themselves. I wish to encourage that within myself.
Finally, there is gratitude. While I do experience powerful waves of gratitude a couple times a month, I'd like to make gratitude a conscious and continuous frame of mind. I had pondered the word 'satisfaction,' but it felt connected to complacency, which is a frame of mind I do not desire. Gratitude feels like the conscious practice of appreciating what has come to pass and the present moment as a way to take in information to help build an even better future. I wish for that.
Considering all this, the above mantra with a little more contextualization: 'Continually seeking matter' is my way of implying action. It is the practice of always looking for information, relationships, connectivity, kinesthesia, anything that affirms and progresses life. Within this directive, I wish to be present, to listen to myself, others, the environment, and the energy, to trust myself, and to be grateful for the origins, means, and ends of my actions.
Continually seeking matter . . .
Presence
Listening
Trust
Gratitude . . .
To close my reflection, Happy New Year to all, and wishes of fullness and gratitude!
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